Ok, she wants you to only be friends. I think you should respect her and stop pursuing her romantically. With that wish, she also has to deal with something else. I suggest that you also do NOT remain friends with her. This is only meeting her emotional needs without getting anything in return. In other words, if you are interested in a woman romantically and settle for a friendship, you are allowing her to step all over you and use you. What do I mean by this? I mean that you are offering her what she needs most emotional support without her having to satisfy your need that romantic connection A man should not stick around and settle for friendship if he wants more.
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I meet a lot of women in particular who are fixated it seems on having “just friends” relationships. What’s that all about? Is there reluctance on the part of Christians to embrace any notions of romance? I don’t get it. Maybe we’ve all been burned too often by others. Am I alone in this?
Have you ever tried to list out all the different dating advice you’ve heard, even just the advice from other Christians? I could go on, and if you’re a part of almost any kind of Christian community, you probably can too. Even though we’re following Jesus, and reading the same Bible, and.
Few other questions have provoked debates as intense, family dinners as awkward, literature as lurid , or movies as memorable. Still, the question remains unanswered. Daily experience suggests that non-romantic friendships between males and females are not only possible, but common—men and women live, work, and play side-by-side, and generally seem to be able to avoid spontaneously sleeping together. In order to investigate the viability of truly platonic opposite-sex friendships—a topic that has been explored more on the silver screen than in the science lab—researchers brought 88 pairs of undergraduate opposite-sex friends into…a science lab.
Privacy was paramount—for example, imagine the fallout if two friends learned that one—and only one—had unspoken romantic feelings for the other throughout their relationship. In order to ensure honest responses, the researchers not only followed standard protocols regarding anonymity and confidentiality, but also required both friends to agree—verbally, and in front of each other—to refrain from discussing the study, even after they had left the testing facility.
These friendship pairs were then separated, and each member of each pair was asked a series of questions related to his or her romantic feelings or lack thereof toward the friend with whom they were taking the study. The results suggest large gender differences in how men and women experience opposite-sex friendships. Men were much more attracted to their female friends than vice versa. Men were also more likely than women to think that their opposite-sex friends were attracted to them—a clearly misguided belief.
Women, too, were blind to the mindset of their opposite-sex friends; because females generally were not attracted to their male friends, they assumed that this lack of attraction was mutual. As a result, men consistently overestimated the level of attraction felt by their female friends and women consistently underestimated the level of attraction felt by their male friends.
Men were also more willing to act on this mistakenly perceived mutual attraction. However, men and women differed in the extent to which they saw attached friends as potential romantic partners.
By Susan If my sources are correct, the following scenario is played out frequently among the world of Christian singles. It happens on both sides of the gender line, but allow me to talk about it from my own female perspective. A man meets a woman and begins to show interest in her. He asks her to spend time with him on a regular basis: He calls her at least once a week just to talk.
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Is it possible for Christian guys and girls to be just friends? It is wise to protect your heart and the hearts of others in all situations, including your friendships. But what about honest to goodness platonic friendship? Is it wise for a Christian girl or guy for that matter to be friends with members of the opposite sex? Just like our relationships, the answer to this question is fairly layered. To some degree it depends on the specific guy and girl involved.
What Did Jesus Do? Jesus had female friends.
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Let me state at the outset: Make sure that the conversations and behaviors you are bringing in to your friendships with guys are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. Spend more time in prayer.
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Let’s just be friends. Originally Posted by Ugly Ignore previous comment. Everything i see him post is negative. I’m good friends with a number of women. In fact, i’ve always had female friends that never got romantic. So yeah, so much for the previous post unfounded accusation. This is pretty simple. The woman has to sit down with said gentleman, and be very clear and direct that IF the friendship is to continue that he needs to understand that this is not some form of leading him on that that she has ZERO intentions of dating him in any fashion.
Here is an idea on what you could say, and how to say it. I know for a woman that may seem rather blunt, but you’re dealing with a man, and when talking to men you need to be blunt and direct. Still be considerate, but just straightforward so he can’t read more into it. I’m happy to maintain a friendship with you, but you MUST understand this is NOT a chance for you to try to change my mind, nor is this me leaving it open that we will ever date.
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You both feel the attraction building up. What do you do? Now is not the time to decide! You must decide before you go on the date what your limits will be. Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness?
Mar 29, Scott Croft What should friendships between single men and women look like? Before continuing with this article, please review the preamble included at the beginning of part 1 of this series, ” Biblical Dating: How intimate of a friendship with someone of the opposite sex is OK? How do I move from friendship to dating? Won’t the friendship be ruined if one of us expresses romantic interest and the other doesn’t respond favorably? Basically, the question seems to be how exactly single Christians should relate to members of the opposite sex in that large and awkward zone between “we’ve never met” and a deliberate dating or courting relationship.
Much of this is a fairly new problem. I won’t repeat the full history lesson here, as several Boundless authors have already discussed it Joshua Rogers most recently, in his excellent piece ” Your Friendgirl Deserves Better “. Essentially, the historical reality is that until 30 or 40 years ago, long, intimate friendships between men and women in which each served as the other’s emotional confidante, relationship adviser and “best buddy” were far less common than they are today.
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No one else is asking me out. Ever had these thoughts about someone you are dating? Too many of my friends are finding themselves there now too. His views helped me establish my own standards regarding marriage.
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Old age, maybe, but not christianity. Christians are people, and we do people stuff, like flirting and having feelings. If a christian has convinced themselves that they are above humanity, then I think there could possibly be some problems there, both theological and psychological, that probably need working on. Hmm well my experience is different, though I agree with you on the point of not convincing one’s self of being above humanity.
I meant it as far as the opposite well, sort of. I was thinking in regards to having a strong enough faith to resist certain temptation while spreading the Gospel in certain types of places or crowds, which again I think “might” depend in combination with someone’s personal weaknesses. Like for example, I’m not sure how I would handle it trying to spread the Gospel through friendship with a group of heavy pot smokers, because I used to smoke a LOT of weed years ago and it was really hard for me to quit, weed is probably still a big temptation of mine, so I’m not sure that it would be a good idea for me at this point new disciple of Christ, very new.
But your post also made me suddenly think of another set of verses I had read recently, in Mark You must be on your guard. You will be handed over to the local councils and flogged in the synagogues.
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We see each other naked while swimming or in the shower or what have you but it makes no difference. And the right person. When we first became friends, i will admit that i liked him, and he liked me, and he did eventually ask me out, but i said no and both of us are so happy that we just stayed friends, because it would be weird. I talk to him about everything, no matter how stupid, because i know he will always judge me and will always be there for me. He knows everything about me, and we share all our secrets, he helps me with any problems i have with my bf and i help him with any problems he has with girls.
I hang out with him all the time.
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